Part One: How to Set New Year’s Resolutions and *Be Successful*! | Getting Clear on Your Resolution

Lighthouse with beacon of light shining across the sea
photo cred:

New Year, New You! It’s that time again; a new year, a new beginning. A time of looking back and looking ahead. A time when we take stock of who we are today and what we hope to achieve, who we want to become in the coming year, then we set our resolutions to pave our way.

The process is energizing and motivating, full of promise, and opportunity! We have a clean slate! We feel inspired and activated and are confident we can achieve our goals! We can be this newer, better version of our already wonderful self! We can achieve these goals! …and then February or March hits, annnd we forget about that “old” Resolution because we’ve slipped into old, familiar patterns or found other outlets for our time and energy that seem a higher priority in that immediate moment. Before we know it, we have fallen off-track and vow to try again next year.

However… What if we don’t have to follow this pattern in 2017? What if we can be more successful? I believe we can.

In this two-part post, we’ll start with reframing how we set our Resolutions and then get into the How-To’s to stick with them for lasting results.

So, let’s get going!

First off, a new way of reframing resolutions.

Resolutions, first and foremost, are goals. Usually lofty goals that we set for ourselves in a variety of areas of our lives. Health, fitness, finance, family, career, spirituality. We sense a gap between who we are and who we want to be, that bourgeoning better version waiting to emerge, and we devise goals to help us bridge the gap.

Simply put, we:

  1. Feel like there’s something more (or something different) that we could be doing with our time, energy, skills and talents
  2. Believe the end result will be rewarding in some way (usually, at its core, we believe it will bring an emotional reward, a way to feel better)
  3. Set intentions to bring this end result to pass

While all of these are well and good to informing personal transformation and growth, a key step we often miss is a hearty and true understanding of why we want to pursue these goals (step 2). We must be deeply truthful with ourselves about our motivations. For instance, losing weight because your wife or doctor wants you to – as important as those factors are – won’t cut it when you bump up against years or decades of long-held habits and beliefs. Action and success are a result of desires and motivations that reside deep within you.

Naming these motivating factors is so important to personal growth and to sticking to your Resolution throughout the year and beyond to achieve lasting change. Naming these factors gives them meaning and signals to your brain and your being to align your choices and actions in an intentional way and to be purposeful with your time, energy, money, words, behaviors.

To honor your Resolution, your intention, for the next year – and beyond! – you must be intentional, and to do so, the motivation behind that intention has to be strong enough to catapult you through and beyond any challenge that might stand in your way, which is why the motivation has to come from deep within you.

This step of naming is the most important of all the How To’s, so take a pause and spend a moment with yourself to get clear on why you’re setting this Resolution for yourself. Write down your Resolution and the Why’s behind it. Studies show that simply writing down your goal gives you a 42% better chance of achieving them! If you take away nothing else from this post, just write down your goal! You don’t have to share it with anyone or post it online; it is for you. Simply write it down for yourself.

As you’ll see in Part Two, writing down your goal will play into other Tips and Tricks for staying on the wagon.

For now, take a pause on New Year’s Eve and write yourself a note. Include your Resolution and why it is important to you to stay on track and be successful. Why does it matter to you?

In Part Two, the six How To’s of sticking to your Resolution are laid out. Once you’re clear on your intention, the supporting structure of these six steps will keep you on track throughout 2017 and beyond!

As always, we love your feedback and thoughts, so leave us a comment below!

May 2017 be your best, brightest, healthiest, and most successful year yet!

Friday Faves

Blame it on the full moon, but this week presented me with some pretty larger-than-life aha! moments. Physical, spiritual and emotional doozies. Despite teetering on a cliche, let’s just all nod when I say “life has a way of showing us what we need to learn.” Through the (sometimes cracked) lens of gratitude, I tried to take it all with grace, perspective and kindness towards myself (one of the biggest challenges of all!). Here’s to hoping each of us face every day with a “bring it on!” attitude and an unfaltering faith that we can handle whatever comes! (Spoiler alert: we can 🙂 )

Hope you had a wonderful week and are treating yourselves to a simply fabulous weekend! xo!

The Wake-Up Call, a.k.a The Infamous Epidural

I had an epidural this week, which is a more aggressive treatment for the nerve pain that, quite honestly, I’ve grown a bit bored with and am ready to have to move on. The pressure, pain and discomfort of the actual procedure itself, though less stellar than a gluten free molten lava cake obviously, was virtually nothing compared to the fear I had of the procedure itself. The heart palpitations, shortness of breath, and whole-body freak-out was just out-of-control; positive self-talk, attention on my breath and mantra recitations be damned. They weren’t helping a bit. Once a pretty fearless “bring it on, gimme whatever you got” girl, I have noticed that although experience has “wizened me” to the potential pains and disappointments life can hold, I’ve really let fear play too much of a lead role in my life. I’ve read (and observed with clients & myself) that our fears are protection mechanisms, but I have decided that I can protect myself well enough, thank you very much, and this so-called “frenemy” can take a hike! Enough already! Needless to say, I am so thankful for finally getting this message loud and clear and, as such, had to give it top billing in my favorite things of the week!


Celebrating the sparkling, bubbly fantasticness of each other’s lives and successes, showing up to share the moments that just plain stink, and lending shoulders and backs when you just can’t do it on your own, our Tribes get us through life. They are our family, our biggest cheerleaders, our tough-love disher outers. I so appreciated the love and support of these girls (and others with whom I didn’t take any pictures 🙂 ) throughout the week!

Gluten Free
No really, a sign from Heaven!

Finding this sign in the airport quite literally made me stop in my tracks! One of my favorite pre-GF bagel shops EVER is now schlepping gluten free goodies!? WHAT? I perused their special section and was pleased to see Udi’s GF muffins and salads sans croutons. I can hardly wait until they have authentic-ish NY bagels for us gluten-free carb queens. Even more of a pleasant surprise, having stopped and shopped here, I ended up sitting in the cafe’s vicinity, which gave me the unique privilege of having a birds’ eye view of the foot traffic, making it easier-than-ever to spot a dear friend with whom I hadn’t connected in far too long! It was simply kismet.


Snuggling Pups
Snuggle Buddies

Just as spending time with our human compadres soothes one’s soul, so does snuggling with sweet animal friends, like these two: Parker & Lilly. They’ve been giving me a little more attention lately, and I can only assume they just know I need it. So fortunate to have found these little creatures and very thankful for their gentle animal nature this week!

Baby Elephant
How can you NOT smile looking at this guy?

This adorable little guy found his way into my Instagram feed, and I could not have been happier about his apropos appearance! Simple joy and love embodied in a baby elephant. I don’t think this one needs any other explanation 🙂

Friday Faves

Clemson Tigers, Tailgate, Family, College Football Fun,

This week has been filled with love, laughter and lots of “opportunities for growth” (aka times when you want to throw in the towel)… so, it was a normal week! Encountering challenges in some aspects of life really throws light onto those other areas where things are going well. With an attitude of gratitude, here’s a look back at all the fun, friendship and favorites of this past week. May you have an effortless end to your week and a simply refreshing weekend! xo!

First Clemson Tailgate Reunited with the tribal framily for the Clemson/Syracuse Homecoming Game. It was simply joyful (and anything but dull)! I pulled out some Parkview H.S. gear to channel my inner Clemson Tiger! Loving Divo in the back, resting his elbow on Little Bit.  Rag tag bunch, we are indeed!
First Clemson Tailgate
Reunited with the tribal framily for the Clemson/Syracuse Homecoming Game. I pulled out some old Parkview H.S. orange gear to channel my inner Tiger! Rag tag bunch, indeed!
Clemson, rowdy, God's country
…in case the organized, perfectly-posed picture gave the impression we are a calm group. We are not.
Louise Hay, guided meditation, self-esteem, you can heal your body
Rediscovering Louise Hay
Loving this new-to-me book by Louise Hay, an author I have rediscovered as a relevant, sage teacher in my ongoing journey to better health & a better version of myself. Her wisdom and guided exercises in self-healing are remarkable (and a little vision boarding never hurt either) 😉 You can find her books on tape on YouTube, as well. Check her out!
This Bartender Playlist Road trips, commutes, writing, the workday are all made better with good tunes. They're the soundtrack to our lives.  This playlist full of y'allternative tracks by Zac Brown Band, Lady A, Cole Swindell, Kenny Chesney, Billy Currington, Eric Church & the like has kept me upbeat and energized, and I just can't get enough of the rockin' twang and outlaw style! Singing along made not only the daily grind, but a certain five hour drive to see some BFF's a lot more fun.
This Bartender Playlist
Road trips, commutes, writing, the workday are all made better with good tunes. They’re the soundtrack to our lives. This playlist full of y’allternative tracks by Zac Brown Band, Lady A, Cole Swindell, Kenny Chesney, Billy Currington, Eric Church & the like has kept me upbeat and energized. I just can’t get enough of the rockin’ twang and outlaw style! Singing along made not only the daily grind, but a certain five hour drive to see some BFF’s, a lot more fun.
Girls Night at True Food Kitchen Old friends, new eats. It was a really refreshing, heartwarming and authentic time together. And not without a hint of sass and sparkle! Easy friendships that welcome you as you are a rarity. So thankful for these girls!
Girls Night at True Food Kitchen
Familiar friends, new eats. Ever have those friends where you can talk about anything, even the really messy stuff that reveals you’re imperfect? Yup, these are the girls! Refreshing, re-affirming and authentic…And not without a hint of sass and sparkle! Easy friendships that let you come as you are a rarity. So thankful for these girls!